Top 10 Reasons Motor Homes are Better than Planes
By Richard Starkey
1. Stewardesses are evil. At some point in the history of air travel, “stewardess” went from being this sexy, glamorous job to crabby drink server. Which makes sense, because it’s only a plane. But since 9/11 each one thinks they’re the last line of defense to the cockpit. Any complaint, no matter how rational, means you could spend the rest of the flight on the ground in flex-cuffs.
3. Motor homes can take you more places. The idea that travel is just about going to another city for a few days is limited. What about pro or college football tailgating? You think a Packers tailgate party would be less fun or more with an RV that has a kitchen, tables, TV and bathroom? I’m thinking it would be more – one trip to a Port-a-san in Green Bay and you’ll think so too. (A people raised on cheese AND beer AND bratwurst? Are you kidding me?)
4. Motor homes have beds. That you can stretch out is one thing. That you or your passengers can move about the cabin as much as they want is another thing. But when everyone can pile on the couch or bed and not have to worry about any strangers – or smell them – motor homes win. You can use motor homes as portable temporary housing if you need to. Can the airlines claim that? Why don’t you ask one of the Jet Blue passengers that had to sleep in an airport terminal last year.
5. Recreational vehicle rental opens up traveling. If you need to get to a meeting in another state by tomorrow, yeah, flying is your best option. But if you’re heading out to see something new, the road offers as much as your destination. It’s part of the thrill of the open road, the places you hardly ever hear about but dot the landscape. Cafes, historical monuments, natural wonders. There are even special destinations like Disneyland RV parks or Yellowstone Park. Which leads directly into reason #5…
6. You can’t get an airline to land in the middle of Yellowstone Park. A motor home not only replaces a plane, it replaces your hotel room and your rental car. It’s everything you need packed into a single vehicle.
7. Motor homes don’t have security checkpoints. When you travel by motor home, you are not only more comfortable, not only allowed to bring as much carry on luggage as you feel like – but you will never have a minimum wage employee root around in your bags to see if you are carrying more than 4 oz. of hair gel.
Because if you want to bring down that Lockheed L-1011 TriStar, all you need is a full bottle of Listerine and the will to do so. Are these people for real?
8. Motor homes do not fall flaming from the sky. That one’s relatively self explanatory though.
9. Planes can leave without you. With air travel, you are entirely at the mercy of the flight schedule. If you really like being insulted, try this on for size: If you are late, the plane will leave without you, but the airline is free to be as late as they please – and they usually are. As a result you can be late for your all-important connecting flight in Pittsburgh… which will leave without you.
10. Planes smell bad. Face it, they do. Have you ever seen what the cleaning crew on a plane does? They fold a blanket or two and swab off any vomit they might find. But since air travel is all about turn around, they don’t have time to do much of anything else. The design on the seat cushions sure looks like they haven’t updated since the mid 80s – so how much butt do you think they’ve had rubbed on them?
A motor home for sale comes whistle clean, and stays as clean as you want it to be. (I mean, hey, there’s a responsibility to clean up after yourself, but that’s the same as at home, right?) If you get a rental, there are days with which to go over the RV with a fine-toothed comb. RV rental companies want your business, so you better believe that means they want their product to be sparklingly fresh.
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